"Please pass the rulllllssss"

The title of the post is a quote from one of my all-time favorite movies, Father of the Bride 2. It's right after George (Steve Martin) takes a sleeping pill and asks for rolls at dinner while slurring his words. If you're thinking "what the heck does this have to do with anything?" hold on, it comes into play for my dream last night. But first, what have I been up to?


I've had off of work for the past few days for these things they call Christmas and New Year's. As always happens though - time off absolutely flies by and I can't believe today is Friday! I've been very giving of my time this week. One of my friends, who we shall know as Roxie - is getting separated from her husband. She is moving out this week. Now, as someone who once left a significant relationship, I know how hard this process can be and the resulting trauma that can result (which Roxie hasn't been completely spared of). When I was in my moment of need, Roxie offered me a lot of support and so I definitely owe her this. But MAN it takes a lot out of me too! I've gone out of my way probably at least 3 times this week over what I normally would do for her. On top of that, I talk to her on the phone almost constantly and today I'm helping her move to her new apartment. Now, don't get me wrong, I love Roxie like a sister and I completely support her (in this situation, it was the right thing for her to do) but in a small way, I feel like I'm experiencing this separation with her and I am TIRED.


Yesterday she was going to spend the day with her Mom helping her pack so I got a day off from that relationship only to work on the relationship with Grandma N. I had a few sweaters from Christmas I needed to return. Now, with Grandma N, you can't just get a gift receipt or - heaven forbid - return it on your own. If Grandma N found out that you got back anything less than what she paid for it....well, I don't even want to speak of what would happen. Similarly, you can't just return something for store credit. Oh, no. That store credit will eat away at her soul every waking second that it exists. So instead, you have to go with her to the mall to ensure that 1) you get full credit back and that 2) you IMMEDIATELY find a replacement for each item. I love, love, love, love my Grandma N. But 2 things you should know about me now are:


1.  I HATE crowds. Particularly when strangers are all in my bubble of personal space. Padawan knows this is why I routinely spazz out at places like grocery stores. I do not like it when I can smell the scent of someone's gum because you're standing thisclose to me! I've been known to be a complete New Yorker on this account - when people bump into me (even by accident) I will totally throw them eye daggers.


2. I HATE browsing. Grocery stores, malls, you name it. I want a plan and I want to get in and out. Aimless wandering will not do. 99.9% of the time if I step foot into any store, it is because I know exactly what I want and I will try to be in and out of the store in record time.


So there I was yesterday, aimlessly wandering a crowded mall for 3 hours *strokes out* *dies*. At the first store, my patience level was pretty good. I hadn't been shopping with Grandma in quite some time so I knew I owed her that and should be patient with her. It didn't help with the start we got though.....she wanted to meet at Macy's by the "junior department" (I figured maybe that was the easiest place to park?) and when I came in, she was holding about 6 items for me, from the juniors department *strokes out* *dies*. I win the best granddaughter award because I tried those items on just to pacify my Grandma. When exiting the dressing room though, and my Grandma was still perusing those racks, I might have had a momentary lapse and screeched "I need to get out of this department right this second!!! It's creeping me out!!!!!! I'm almost 30 years old!!!!!" The 50 yr old sales lady thought my proclamation was quite amusing.


Finally, after what felt like a million hours and thousands of stores, everything was returned and I was set free. It's weird how tired that little excursion made me. So much so that I spent the remainder of the day curled up on my couch with my tablet, reading away.


And speaking of tired...here was last night's dream:

Bread. Yup I said it. Bread. Bread was clearly significant last night. Padawan and I had driven past a church that had advertised a bread sale, so we pulled over. I got my "admission ticket" to enter the bread sale and what lay ahead of me was more bread than the eye could see. Skyscraper tall racks and racks of bread. All different kinds of bread (but all freshly made).  I picked out a nice small loaf of bread for our house and then, knowing that Padawan has an unhealthy obsession with bread (he does), I sought out the perfect bread for him. I went around poking different bread-things (apparently in my dream, you can touch other people's food). I was trying to find the most perfectly squishy bread for him.  I finally found it in the form of this knotted, pretzel-shape bread loaf. So I bought my two pieces of bread and paid and we went back to the car.

And with that conclusion, I have to go get ready for helping Roxie move.

Hear me ROAR!

The scene for last night's dream was in our old grey house, the one that was in the ghetto. Everyone was there from my Mom's side - the cousins, the aunts and uncles, etc. Even Grandma A and Grandpa N were there. Now, that wouldn't seem weird except for the fact that Grandma A passed away almost 4 years ago. But wait....that doesn't make it weird enough. I know Brain! Let's make all the other characters human and make Grandma and Grandpa LIONS...yup...that'd be great. So there we all were in our old teeny, tiny living room just hanging out....all us humans...and the lions. Even funnier was the fact that Grandpa could speak human but Grandma could only roar so he had to communicate with her for us. There was no "special message" to it. That was basically my dream.

The Big Apple

Merry Christmas everyone!


I had a splendid time last night at Grandma N's house with my family. Much fun was had visiting with Grandma, Aunts, Uncles, and my own family.


My cake was appreciated by all. As it should be - it took me about 2 days to make since it was the first time I ever made fondant. I didn't make enough fondant to cover the cake (which was the goal), and I was outta time so instead, I used the frosting I had to frost the whole cake white. Then, I dyed different sections of the fondant and made fondant presents to go around the whole base of the cake and a little fondant Christmas tree for the top. I had a lot of fun making it but man dying fondant is a bitch! My arms were so sore! Either my fondant was too tough or I'm too weak. It could definitely be both.


Presents were great. I received some lovely sweaters, some perfume, and Padawan and I received a lovely "Our 1st Christmas" ornament from Grandma N.


In related news, here was last night's dream:

I was visiting Grandma N's "house" only it wasn't a "house" and it was no longer in the suburbs of a regular city. She had a HUGE loft-style apartment in NYC and it was definitely on 5th avenue. I remember Aunt L being there and she and I were helping Grandma N "clean out her closets" even though what we were doing had nothing to do with closets. Her apartment was set up similar to a department store and all of her clothing was on those metal clothing racks, scattered around the HUGE apartment. I found one evening gown that I wanted to keep for myself. It was a black and white velvet, floor-length gown (similar to the one Julia Roberts wore when she won her Oscar...not exactly, but similar). I remember I tried it on and loved it. That was basically my dream.

This morning, Padawan and I exchanged gifts. This didn't take long as we only had a few to exchange. He got me a new digital photo frame, which I appreciate because our old one died. I also love looking at all our photos! He also got me some new pajamas because the last pair he got me (three Christmases ago) are definitely past their prime (but ohhhhhh so comfy!). So now I have two comfy pajamas I can wear!

Now we are off to my parent's house for more festivities!

Strike!

So in last night's dream, I went with a whole bunch of people to a bowling alley. Except this wasn't just any bowling alley....oh no. This was a bowling alley that was owned and operated by Bollweevil. Which is funny. The last time I went bowling was 2 summers ago (and before that I couldn't even tell you). The last time I went bowling with Bollweevil was....maybe when we were children. But I can't even guarantee that. The best part about this bowling was that instead of using regular bowling balls, we were bowling with huge inflatable balls!!! Think...the size of bean bag chairs. It was great fun.